Thursday, December 27, 2018

Fred Smith - The Day After Christmas - 2018 Version Plus Ghosts of Past Fred Xmas Posts

Once more my fellow  Skinny award recipient Fred Smith gives us his yearly treat. Below this year's version are some of his past greatest hits.

The Day After Christmas (2018)

It’s the day after Christmas; I’m sitting here stumped.
How could it happen that all the joy had been trumped?
Even Santa, dear Santa, had taken to bed,
And a platinum imposter had stolen his sled.
It was too late to stay him, this darkest year’s Eve
With a sack full of coal, wearing hate on his sleeve.
He grabbed at the reins on his miserable journey.
In the lead stood Rudolph the red-faced attorney,
Who was followed up close by his stable of does.
It gave us new meaning as he roared Ho, Ho, Hos.
“On Ivana and Marla—never feel bitter.
And don’t dare look back as I play with my twitter.
On Melania and Stormy, keep pulling my sleigh;
Onward Huckabee too, and on Kelly Conway.
And so now let me check to see who’s on my list
Who deserve prizes and who got me really pissed:
There’s nothing I have for folks in states that are blue;
And Puerto Rico gets less for all it’s been through;
Must take care of the red states, for that is my base;
And those bearing arms to protect our supreme race;
(And while it enters my mind during this flight,
I want a new flag that’s one hundred percent White.)
There’s goodies for Bibi, and the Saudi crown prince,
With much love for Kanye, who makes Obama wince;
And hail the electors who ensured my first term;
And anyone out there who made Hillary squirm;
Poison apples to prune-faced Nancy and Schumer;
I wish them each an inoperable tumor.
That goes double for Rachel and for O’Donnell;
But, for now, complete praises for Mitch McConnell.
For Kate McKinnon and the cast of SNL,
Here’s a one-way ticket—You can go straight to hell;
And I must heap scorn on all my hand-chosen elves
Whom I ousted for thinking of only themselves.
For every deserter, a replacement was found
As my cabinet door kept on spinning around.
Of course, I have nothing for immigrant children
Who have infested our land by several million;
Or all diseased terrorists and Muslim invaders;
I’ll squash them to save us from such infiltrators.
The question’s not will I, but rather when shall I
Turn against anyone who thinks I’m his ally.
Bless Betsy beside me, busy fixing each school;
Vouchers, charters and God’s mission supply her fuel.
While the stock markets crash, you know that I’m grinning.
Got plenty of hotels and cash—It’s called winning!
The wine soon wore off. The ride didn’t happen at all.
Should’ve known when his first stop was to visit The Wall
Would have thwarted and put a swift end to his game,
As he screamed and raged looking for someone to blame.
Noёl, no Wall, he became hair-trigger irate;
How can I go on to make America great?
Wound up with a Whopper home alone on silk sheets,
While he spouted off outbursts of unseemly tweets.
Still I’m shaken; I hope this was just a bad dream,
A scary clown Santa trapped in his deranged scheme.
2017: Fred Smith: Dispirit of the Season

2016: Fred Smith's Annual "Night Before Christmas"

2015: Fred Smith, Poet Laureate of Opt Out - 'Twas the night before...

And then there’s Mulgrew who must choose who is winning
To claim he was backing them from the beginning. 
I first met Fred, a testing expert who used to work for the NYCBOE, when he contacted me about getting ICE members to assist in gathering data for his exposures of the evils of testing. Over the years, his involvement with groups like GEM and Change the Stakes has grown.

Fred is also a statistician for the NY Jets - don't blame him for their absence from the Super Bowl for almost 50 years.

Fred Smith convincing Jets dancers to boycott field tests - he's the one in the middle

Last year (2014) Fred Smith gave us this gem.
Fred Smith: The Day Before Xmas (With Arne Duncan ...

~Fred Smith

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Post WW2 global interventionism has been a disaster. Trump is dismantling the empire.
Surely the left must like this. Ohh!! Where's the anti war movement?